How To Ask Someone If They’re Okay Over Text? – Best Suggestions

Usually, texting is not a great way to ask if someone is doing okay because it’s hard for us to tell the changes in their emotions and attitudes. However, texting could be a good way to let them know that you care about them, especially for people who do not like phone calls or face-to-face conversations. Moreover, it’s not always a suitable time to make a phone call or meet, so texting can help in this case.

This article will therefore discuss the topic “How To Ask Someone If They’re Okay Over Text” with the information gathered from personal experience and opinions and recommendations from users on the discussion forum. Hope this article helps you.

How To Ask Someone If They’re Okay Over Text

When you want to text to check in on your friends, using the scripted “Are you OK?” seems not a good choice. To me, it shows no sincerity nor that you truly want to know if I am OK or not, especially if that person is not my close friend.  Many people might also feel that. This is because giving a Yes/No question like that makes them find it easy to refuse to express their feeling. 

Thus, try to use open-ended questions so your friends will incline to reveal their feelings. You can start with the sentence showing that you notice something different from them, such as: “Hey you’re looking kind of down,…” or “Hey, I’ve noticed that something doesn’t seem right in your world,…”

Some other ways to ask your friend if they are OK over text, instead of the scripted “Are you OK?” one:

  • “How was your day?”
  • “Hey you’re looking kind of down. What happened?/ what is going on?”
  • “Darling, what’s weighing you down?”
  • “I see that there is obviously something wrong with you. Would you like to talk about it?”

Sometimes, yes/no questions can help when you use them with open-ended questions, like: “I saw your post, it looks like you are not OK. What’s has happened? Would you like to talk about it?” Then if they want to share, they will open up; if not, they won’t feel forced to.

Besides, if your friend is a person that is likely to push people away when they are upset or struggling with their feelings, you can also text messages to let them know you are always here and ready to listen to your problems, such as: “I know you’re not ready to talk. But I’m here when you are” or “I’m here if you need me.”

If you have time to call or to have a face-to-face meet-up, you should call them to hear their voice. If both of you can go out and talk about it, try to listen to their stories and give them a hug.

Try to use open-ended questions
Try to use open-ended questions

How to ask a girl if she is okay over text?

To ask a girl if she is okay by texting, you can first let her know that you know something wrong with her from your observation and then follow up with an open-ended or a yes/no question. For example, “You look upset in your story, what happened? Would you like to talk about it?” Then, you can also leave the message “I’m here if you need me” if she refuses to talk about her problems.

How to ask someone how they are doing over text?

If you want to know how your friend is doing, just be upfront about it.

  • “How are you doing lately?”
  • “Hey, how was your day, my dear?”
  • “You look pale, is everything ok? How do you feel lately?”
  • “So, what have you been up to?”
  • “What are your plans for the day?”
  • “How was your week been?”

How To Ask “Who Is Texting” Politely?

Sometimes, you get messages from unknown phone numbers or social accounts. These messages can be from scammers or from potential clients or friends. So, if you don’t know those numbers or accounts, you can ask them to identify themselves. 

For example: “Hi, have we already talked before? I don’t have you on my contact list.”

Besides, you can use shorter and more direct to identify who they are by starting with a short greeting like “hello/hi.”

  • “Hello! May I ask who this is?”
  • “Hey, this might be the wrong number. My name is …”
  • “Hi! You’re not in my contacts. May I know who this is?”
  • “Hello. Have we met before? You are not in my contacts.”
  • “Hi, this is (your name). I think you might have the wrong number.”

How to ask someone their name over text?

You can ask their name on the text directly. For example:

  • “Do you mind if I ask your name?”
  • “I forgot to ask your name.”
  •  “Would you mind telling me your name?”
  • Or just simply, “What is your name?”


Should I ask someone if they are okay?

Asking someone if they’re okay or other concern-focused types of questions like: Are you hurt, cold, hot, mad, etc., isn’t wrong. You can ask them such questions as long as you are sincerely concerned about them, desire to help them, and do not really understand what happened to them.
For other ways to ask someone if they are okay, you can read this article.

How to ask someone why they messaged you?

You can first ask them to identify themselves and then the reason why they texted you. For example:
“Hi, have we met or talked yet? If not, what make you send this message?”

Should I ask “how was your day?”

It’s nothing wrong to ask “How was your day?”, but you should replace it with other specific terms, like “What was the best part of your day?” or “Did anything surprise you today?”
This is because the “how was your day?” could be asked as a logistical check-in on the other people, not about the intention to know deeper about their experience in a day, according to The Science of People.

5/5 - (1 vote)

Leave a Comment

Social Share Buttons and Icons powered by Ultimatelysocial